Mom Date Review: The 40th Birthday Mammogram

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends starting routine mammograms at 40 years. Having turned 40 this year, that means we were due for our very first mammogram.

Mary’s Part

While this topic may seem a bit off brand for Child(ish) Advice, it really isn’t. Routine health checkups are part of a broader occupation known as health management. Plus, taking care of yourself and your well-being also allows you to be the wonderful parent you are.

So here’s our PSA: Schedule your mammogram. It’s a powerful tool for early detection, it’s regulated, and yes—it’s covered by insurance.

I’ll admit, getting a mammogram wasn’t high on my to-do list. I don’t have a personal or family history of breast cancer, I’m generally healthy, and if I’m being honest, I’m not exactly working with a lot of breast tissue. Plus, pop culture’s portrayal of the whole “boob-smashing machine” scenario? I mean, have you seen This is 40?
P.S. None of these reasons are valid for not getting a mammogram done.

I wasn’t exactly sure what I was expecting. I think maybe something out of a Real Housewives episode, where everyone’s sipping mimosas in matching gowns, chatting casually while we wait our turn for a boob check. That… was not the vibe. The whole thing took about 15–20 minutes. You get called in, swap your top for a gown, a tech handles your breasts in the machine, change back, and walk out with a reminder card for next year’s appointment. Quick, clinical, and surprisingly uneventful.

As for whether or not it hurt, it didn’t for me. The technician handled the process with care and precision, positioning the tissue gently to capture the best possible scan. It felt more like a firm chest massage and squeeze than anything uncomfortable.

While the efficiency of the whole process is great, I can’t help but think getting mammograms deserves a little glam. Botox and Boobs party, anyone? Your girl turns 40, why not throw a med spa celebration with a mammogram on the menu?

Honestly, this screening should be part of the milestone moment. Add in some relaxation, ease the anxiety, make it feel like a rite of passage instead of a chore. Right now, only 61.2% of women aged 40–49 have had a mammogram. We can do better and we can make it a fun experience, too.

Patti’s Part

Not gonna lie, I was actually looking forward to finally turning 40 and scheduling my first mammogram. I’m also the person who has been texting all my friends this year, “Happy 40^th Birthday, get your mammogram.”

While my family has no clear history of breast cancer or the BRCA gene, I have had two friends who have passed away at incredibly unfair ages due to breast cancer. My mother has also had cysts removed from breast tissue as well. Whatever your personal history or opinion of doctors may be, I’ve always erred on the side of early detection and prevention. Flu shots, annual physicals, vitamins, hormone panels, and now mammograms.

I also saw the RHOBH episode with Lisa Rinna asking Kyle to go with her to get her mammogram, and then Kyle deciding on the spot to get hers done early as well. That gave me the idea of going with Mary, knowing that it probably wasn’t at the top of her list.

When I was planning this outing for us, I chose a women’s imaging specialist office that was recommended from my OB/GYN. (Fun Fact: Mary and I also have the same OB/GYN.) The original test order was to go to our local hospital’s radiology center, but this office specializes in mammograms, is much easier to schedule, and has a quicker, more pleasant experience.

After checking in and changing, I went to the exam room and technician did a quick explanation since it was my first time. “Just so you know, I will be touching your breasts. I’m going to get all up in them like they belong to me.” Huge LOL.

Personally, after dealing with breast feeding, pumping, and lactation consultants, I don’t think I’m that sensitive anymore about my boobs, especially when I’m in a health care/medical environment.

They took four scans altogether, one from the top/bottom of each breast and one from the sides. I wouldn’t describe the feeling as particularly painful as much as it is incredibly awkward and uncomfortable. I was definitely holding my breath, counting to ten. The machine does pull at your skin, so it feels like you are being pulled down or squatting weirdly. To get the side scan, you are pretty much just hugging the machine at a weird angle. Breathe it out…

We got to see the scans afterwards and I appreciated the detail that the techs provided into what they were looking for and what makes a good scan. I felt super accomplished, thanked everyone for their help, and on the way out, they gave me a magnet reminder that they’ll see us next year. Yes, EVERY year…oof. That definitely deserves a post-appointment massage.

Things to Consider

You don’t have to go alone, especially for your first time. Chances are one of your girlfriends might be due for theirs too. Going together can ease anxiety, provide emotional safety, and make the whole experience feel more doable. Their calm presence, a little humor and distraction, and quiet support go a long way. They are also great at helping you follow through when nerves kick in. We did a three-way phone call with the office to schedule. They did give us the option of getting our scans together in the same room or just concurrently.
Make it a girl date. Grab coffee, hit the spa, run a few errands, or treat yourselves to lunch. The appointment is so quick, it’s easy to fold into a day of catching up.
People are nice. Many clinics understand the vulnerability and fear that can surround mammogram screenings. Their staff are committed to making the experience as comfortable as possible. It’s not just to ease anxiety, but to make it quick and capture the clearest image the first time.
Ask questions. The staff truly welcome them, especially if you’re feeling nervous. We asked everything from what they’re actually looking for (masses, asymmetries, or distortions of breast tissue), to how breast implants might affect the process (because I was curious), to what happens next after the appointment (just in case). They were kind, clear, and happy to walk us through it all.