In the Home

Expectation vs Reality: Table Manners

| Mary Stoffel, MOT, OTR/L

“Eat dinner as a family”, they said.

“It’ll help boost morale and connection with your kids,” they said.

“It’ll be a great time had by all,” they said.

Then why do we feel like we’re banging our heads up against the wall when our kid’s behavior and manners at the table are like a scene out of Gremlins? Well, no one said it was going to be easy (and if they did, they are liars).

Family dinners have been a cultural norm in the US for decades. But all those wholesome Norman Rockwell scenes of sitting together and politely eating a meal are not the realities of what we ACTUALLY experience on a daily basis right now. In fact, it’s quite the opposite (kids getting in and out of chairs, refusing to eat their food, spills/messes on the floor, you and your spouse trying to talk over the calamity, etc).

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Breaking Down So Badly: After-School Restraint Collapse

| Mary Stoffel, MOT, OTR/L

The first few weeks of school can be a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde situation. Your kid’s teacher tells you they’re doing great at school, making friends, paying attention, all that good stuff. But that’s not what you see when you get home. In fact, you get quite the opposite (screaming, crying, perfect storms). So, what in the T. Swift is going on?

Turns out that these fits and meltdowns are typical, so typical that it even gets its own special name: After-school restraint collapse. Originally coined by counselor and parenting expert Andrea Loewen Nair, it refers to a child’s emotional, mental, and physical release once their school day is over. School is regimented with rules to follow and lessons to learn, plus picking up all the social cues and expectations from classmates and teachers; all requiring mental stamina and self-control. So once our kids hop in the car or get off the bus, they start to decompress in whatever form they see fit.

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Like Clockwork: Circadian Rhythm

| Mary Stoffel, MOT, OTR/L

Things to do before the school year starts:

  • Buy school supplies
  • Buy school clothes
  • Meet new teacher(s)
  • Getting kiddo back to a regular bedtime (Yeah, about that…)

It’s not easy getting your kid back into routine after summer vacation, especially when sunset is well past 8pm. There’s a reason for that. It’s the same reason we feel energized, tired, or hungry throughout the day. It’s our circadian rhythm.

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Taming the Dog Days of Summer: Getting Back into Routine  

| Mary Stoffel, MOT, OTR/L

School’s been out for summer and now, so is your kid’s schedule.

For those couple months of warm weather, kids are engaged with family vacations and camps, but there is still a lot of down time. Although everyone deserves a well-earned break, it can be difficult for kids to get back into the swing of things, especially when their new school year is just around the corner. It’s not entirely their fault though. The summer can dysregulate our children without even trying.

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The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly: Potty Training, Round 2

| Mary Stoffel, MOT, OTR/L

The first time we wrote this post, we decided it was not going to be a how-to on potty training. Instead, we wanted to share our different approaches and normalize the experience for parents. While going to the bathroom is obviously easy for adults, having the patience to coach your child through potty training is a whole different story, wrought with frustration and a lot of Clorox.
So now, two years later, we are on to Round Two.

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